


So Much for the Afterglow

by NeoVenus22



Series: Hard Rock Life [7]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Cats, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-14
Updated: 2010-01-14
Packaged: 2017-10-06 06:52:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeoVenus22/pseuds/NeoVenus22
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Stargate Atlantis band AU, following the adventures of the band Lantean.  Rodney's cat needs to be locked up.  Rodney probably should be, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	So Much for the Afterglow

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Two of a Kind, Working on a Full House](https://archiveofourown.org/works/50871) by [NeoVenus22](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeoVenus22/pseuds/NeoVenus22). 



"Nick, c'mon, Nick," Rodney cajoled, waving a catnip mouse back and forth in front of the closet door. "C'mon out, buddy, it's okay?"

"Hey, McKay-" began Ronon, coming into the room to find Rodney's ass in the air. "...what're you doing?"

"Nick's hiding. He won't come out."

"She," Ronon corrected.

"Whatever. He --she-- _whatever_\-- has been holed up in this closet for a day." Rodney jangled the mouse some more with a frown. "I'm worried he's not eating."

"She."

"What's going on?" asked John, appearing in the doorway beside Ronon.

"Cat won't come out of the closet," Ronon explained.

John smirked. "Can I?"

"_No_," said Rodney, glaring sourly. "Keep all so-called witty rejoinders to yourself, Sheppard. My cat is not gay."

"Obviously not. She's getting it from somewhere."

"My cat is not a whore!"

"She wouldn't be hiding in the closet if she wasn't getting something from somewhere," said Ronon.

"Look, I don't know what kind of women _you_ two hang around with... well, actually, I am often painted an increasingly disturbing picture on that very subject, but-"

An odd look crept over John's face. "McKay," he said, "you _did_ get Rhoda fixed, right?"

Rodney straightened abruptly, banging his head off the doorknob. "Ow! I mean, no. I don't think so. I don't know."

"You don't _know_?"

"This is why I don't have pets," said Ronon.

"We were doing that whole promotional tour..." murmured Rodney, wringing the catnip mouse's body back and forth, "I guess it slipped my mind..."

"It slipped your mind when you did a promo for the Humane Society on spaying and neutering your pets?" said John.

"I have a _lot of things on my mind, John_!"

John flung up his hands in surrender. The vein in Rodney's neck was bulging again. "Okay, okay, panties, untwist."

Rodney let out a little choked sound. Ronon's brows raised slightly.

"It's not a big deal, Rodney," he said calmly. "I've got a lot more people I can call to take the kittens..."

Rodney snorted. "Yes, still more lovesick waifs from the John Sheppard Foundation for Horny Idiots."

"You named it?" asked Ronon, looking sideways at John.

"Look, do you want my help or not?" demanded John.

Rodney shifted back and forth, a physical manifestation of his desire to tell John Sheppard to shove it being in direct conflict with his inability to birth kittens. Much less keep them. He was barely keeping his head above water with the decision to keep Nick Rhodes Jr. from Nick Rhodes's first litter. "I... Okay, fine. Call your... whatever. And while you're at it, call a vet."

"A vet?"

"I'm sure you must have slept with at least one. Don't you collect them like Barbies or Pokemon cards? A doctor, a lawyer, a vet, a circus acrobat?"

"Hey, don't knock Candace. She was very nice and she'll probably take one of your cats."

"Oh my god, her name was seriously _Candace_?"

"Is this helping?"

"Um, guys?" said Ronon. They turned to look at him, then followed his gaze to the closet, where a low wail was issuing. And then a very impressive shrieking meow.

"Oh my god, who's killing my cat?"

"Chill, McKay."

John smirked at Ronon. "Break out the cigars, McKay's going to be a daddy. Again."

The catnip mouse now a battered lump in his hand, Rodney braved the closet. "What in the _hell_! I just put this carpet in!"


End file.
